Giving Away My Stuff

Bromista

Grandmaster
though most of the good stuff is on my friends account I won't be touching that, however there is still some stuff I can give away on my accounts that I don't really care about anymore. I gave up playing a long time ago and only ever logged in on my laptop to refresh houses. Well, I've been gone so long this time that now my houses are gone giving me no reason to ever come back. SOOOOOOOOOO, here is your chance at some free stuff. I think I have around 7.5 mill gold on this account which someone can have and 20 yards of 1281 gold cloth if its still rare is worth something. Also have various other things you can ask me about which I won't need.

here are ways that you can get my stuff

-reply to this thread saying why you want some stuff or need some stuff
-be someone I liked while playing (which is probably nobody)
-draw a funny picture
-make up a story where the lead role is Shane as a female
-be someone I knew and just be like "hey Rift give me your stuff"
-just do something

but don't PM Me because I will ignore them.......you have 1 week. may the worst of you win
You mean that 20 yards of gold cloth that you "sold" twice already now?

LOL, the door is that way ------>

Don't let it hit you in the ass on the way out, bro.
 
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Rift I don't think we know each other but the reason why I would really like your gold is so that I don't have to make sigs to make a living in this game. Did you see Azrias sig? I had to go through the work of photoshopping his characters bulge. This isn't something I want to do but I have no choice but to whore out my skills to get by, please help me out of this life of prostitution.
 

TheGooch

Master
Don't know you or care to know you. What I'm getting from your post is let me dangle this carrot in front of you and make you practically beg me with some replies on WHY I should give it you. I want a weeks worth of comments and drawings to make me lol. How about just donating it to staff for another gold sink courtesy of you? I personally would love to see you shove that carrot up your ass on the way out. :D
 

Bromista

Grandmaster
Don't know you or care to know you. What I'm getting from your post is let me dangle this carrot in front of you and make you practically beg me with some replies on WHY I should give it you. I want a weeks worth of comments and drawings to make me lol. How about just donating it to staff for another gold sink courtesy of you? I personally would love to see you shove that carrot up your ass on the way out. :D
Dangling a carrot...well put. I am reminded of the times this gold cloth came up for sale at twice the market value. When it wasn't getting any interest at that price our buddy Rift got hostile and threatened to trash can it.

This guy is damaged goods, which is what you'd expect from a guy with a fake female profile.

What I find even funnier is the fact that all the major players who were/are interested in these yds have 0 interest in this clowns shenanigans and aren't even remotely considering pursuing them as long as Rift is holding.
 

Raynan

Master
just give all ur stuff to me

your advantage:

-done fast
-forgettin fast
-no problems
-no hassle
-only one ugly guy
 
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jeffe

Master
Wha!!!??? MS Paint and make-believe for a chance at gold and prizes? I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo in....

As the stalwart Shane woke up from a deep slumber in the middle of the arctic Candian winter he could sense something was wrong: the room smelled of iron and sweat. Shane's eyes flickered open and winced at the harsh light invading his sleeping quarters. He had drawn the curtains closed before he lay down. Again the smell of sweat and iron closer and more pungent this time invaded his nostril.

*Ploop*.....*ploop*

Something warm and wet dripped just above Shane's eyes. There it was again, his forehead was being covered in some kind of... substance. He was suddenly aware of a thick, heavy breathing just above him. Vision finally catching focus he peered up to see a face he knew all to well.

*ploopploopploop*

Shane thrashed in his bed in sudden agony as blood had been dripped in his eyes. The Dread Lord BLOODY NIPS slowly bellowed a sinister laugh, "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! YOU SHANE, YOU WILL BE MY BRIDE." Shane's movements immediately slowed...he couldn't move something had rendered him invalid.

*ploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploopploop*

Blood smoothered Shane, he couldn't breathe for it seemingly had begun crawling up his nose. He was suffocating and beginning to succumb to darkness. His mouth swung open to gasp for air. Immediately, he could taste rust. His body weakly convulsed trying to eject the poison that flowed in. He was done. He let go.....


*Meanwhile*
*DOOGIES HEAD SPINS ALA THE BAT SYMBOL FROM THE ADAM WEST BATMAN--MUSIC ALSO PLAYS* (wish I could find a youtube clip for what I am talking about)

DaRift now homeless drifts through the wildernesses of Sosaria. Her hands stuffed deep inside the pockets of her Snuggie to protect her from the morning chill. She remembers the surfaces of her old home. The woods the stones. Were these things permanent she would have bumped into the walls and left dents coming home late from the bar. The burn on the floor, there, was where she had put to rest the thief that had sneakily followed her in to her abode. The blood splatter on the wall--no matter how many times she scrubbed persisted, she painted, it bled through--from a friendly spar amongst guildmates that left her decapitated. If these things were permanent she could have said goodbye one last time. She no longer could reach them, but they would be there. Alas, here, as in life, there are hard truths: nothing is forever, there comes a time to say goodbye any way you can. She wondered, nothing seemed to surround her. The day had run its course. Night had come. Clouds blocked out the moons of Sosaria. She sensed something was wrong. She could smell.... BLOOD!

*The DOOGIES HEAD THING AGAIN... I REALLY WISH I COULD FIND AN EXAMPLE ON YOUTUBE!*

Shane felt dizzy. He wasn't sure how long he had been asleep or even awake. The room spun. "Oh god.." He tried to steady himself. Whoooosh. "Just gotta sit up. If I sit up." Whoosh. His world turned inside out. "Okay. Sit up. Just get to the edge of the bed." Whoosh. Back outside in. "Nope, can't make it. I am eternally damned to be stuck in this bed forever."

...

The tides went out. "Okay I am going for it here's my chance... I am sitting up." He labored. "C'mon. Oh this harder than a three week bender with Carl. Pre-kids days." He sort of bounced up. He glanced down. "...I...n-n-n-n..ww..." For the first time he uttered a shrill sound outloud "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He jostled to the doors ahead of him emitting light. "NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!"

*COMMERICAL BREAK*

"SHANE MY TRAPTASTIC BRIDE!!" cried the Dread Lord BLOODY NIPS swinging his flaming scimitar through the air. DaRift could see the horror in Shane's eyes even from the balcony near the top of BLOODY NIP's tower.

Out of instinct she muttered, "Vas Ort Flam."

Nips about faced. Grimaced. Body clenched. The air stood still.

hWVdjh7.png


DaRift held the classic lady wizard/telekinetic/super power pose, because it is like the way all women are drawn(Todd McFarland) when you read comic books through your adolesence*LIGHTNING CRASHED*

Shane screamed, "Ya gotta help me DaRift!?"

DaRift wasn't sure what to do. She hesitated. Her cursor disappeared. Nothing was forever, remember? "Nothing is forever."

BLOODY NIPS charged! Screaming out a war cry that rivaled that of Xena Warrior Princess.

"Kal Ort Por [Recall]"

The Dread Lord BLOODY NIPS was crestfallen, the murderous and vicious griefer's tone changed, "She didn't even try... trammies... trammies everywhere."

BLOODY NIPS dropped to his knees. "Nothing is foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..." the 'r' trailed as the wound inflicted by his flaming Scimitar spilled his intestines out of his stomach. The slopped onto the ground as if they were a freshly encased and strung together sausage occasionally bursting and spurting juice. BLOODY NIPS looked up to Shane for a last time. "My beautiful bride... how selfish have I been?"

The scimitar engulfed BLOODY NIPS in flames. "AVENGE MY DEATH MY BRIDE!!! MAKE FOREVER!!!"

This is how Shane witnessed a Seppuku and self-immolation at the same time.

This is also the true ORIGIN story of UOFOREVER. Shane made forever.

Adam eventually coded away all of Shane's female features and Bryce retaught him how to be a man.

All errors and inconsistencies in voice, tone, and person are intentional and can be explained through time travel. This will be detailed in the upcoming appendix. I am currently consulting with both Karl Sagans on this.

*Couple of notes.
-This is what happens when you don't live up to your potential kids. It also shows the amazing powers of weed.
-Hopefully this story leaves you horrified, saddened and a little amused; just as a true goodbye should.
-I drew the picture before I wrote the story. Both took a long time.
-The Trappy stuff was awkward to write. I tried to poke fun but hustle through it. Pretty much like reading a Le Guin novel (Ursula K. DO YOU EVEN LIBRARY BRO?).
-That symbol on the right is my signature, kthx.
-I still wish I could find an example of the bay symbol spinning I am talking about. They play on the trope all the time in parody cartoons.
-Remember DaRift if you ever find your way again. We are here. Forever. <<<Fuckin' sappy ass shit.

hehe, I am a weirdo.
 
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Dracule

Grandmaster
Rift I don't think we know each other but the reason why I would really like your gold is so that I don't have to make sigs to make a living in this game. Did you see Azrias sig? I had to go through the work of photoshopping his characters bulge. This isn't something I want to do but I have no choice but to whore out my skills to get by, please help me out of this life of prostitution.

Must have been a lot of photoshopping around that bulge area eh.. lol
 

Gill

Master
I could use some gold so i can finally get my 120 Tinker PS to make a soul forge :) Hope you dont quit for good.
 

Karl Sagan

Grandmaster
though most of the good stuff is on my friends account I won't be touching that, however there is still some stuff I can give away on my accounts that I don't really care about anymore. I gave up playing a long time ago and only ever logged in on my laptop to refresh houses. Well, I've been gone so long this time that now my houses are gone giving me no reason to ever come back. SOOOOOOOOOO, here is your chance at some free stuff. I think I have around 7.5 mill gold on this account which someone can have and 20 yards of 1281 gold cloth if its still rare is worth something. Also have various other things you can ask me about which I won't need.

here are ways that you can get my stuff

-reply to this thread saying why you want some stuff or need some stuff
-be someone I liked while playing (which is probably nobody)
-draw a funny picture
-make up a story where the lead role is Shane as a female
-be someone I knew and just be like "hey Rift give me your stuff"
-just do something

but don't PM Me because I will ignore them.......you have 1 week. may the worst of you win

I just want your stuff so I can have more stuff.

When I inevitably quit (maybe not too long from now...) I will hold an event and let everyone watch as I trashbarrel every rare pixel and piece of gold I have. Your gold cloth can be part of this fun and I will make sure I let everyone know it was yours before I trash it one yard at a time.

I will send you pics of the tears if you give me your stuff (all of it thx).
 

Desi

Grandmaster
Ehh. I'll stand behind Rift on this one. Based on private conversations I think he/she (who cares?) is ready to leave and would like to donate what they've accumulated into the community. Add in a healthy dose of ego-tism and you have current thread. Just a hunch.

@Karl Sagan, WHY would you destroy parts of this shard's history? Call it trammy-tears but i'm not understanding completely your logic here.
 

Liberty

Grandmaster
Rift, I will hold your stuff for you....even though you are the scum of the shard. Check my pm please.
 

TheFallen

Grandmaster
So if you drop your house the game reverts. If you post your quiting forum reverts.

"Just when I t thought I was out, they drag me back in."

Uoforever - living up to its name.
 
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